Loss of Innocence

It happened,

Happened

At that very moment

When I noticed

That you noticed me.

I was

But a chit of a girl;

Raging hormones

Making me susceptible to

Frequent bouts of love.

You came

You came to me!

And things happened

Maybe happened

A little too fast;

Not that I complain

Or blame you

In any way 

Whatsoever.

It's just that 

Things happened

And I hadn't

Seen them coming.

One moment

There we were

Looking gooey eyed

At each other;

Your urgent hands

Roving over

My budding breasts

At the next.

I am not 

Accusing you

at all.

I had wanted it then,

Maybe

With as much desire

As you had.

After all

My then diet

Of dreamy romances

Told me it was heaven.

It happened

At that moment

When you noticed me;

The moment

That you came.

It happened

At that moment

When you noticed me

But you failed 
to notice

You had left me behind.

Striptease

Eager eyes await

The star of the show.

She of course,

Will be fashionably late

Having aroused

Just the right anticipation.

The stage is set,

Whispers heard

Of the small talk ensuing

To cover up 

the obvious excitement

Exaggerated rumours

Of her naive beauty

Have brought about.

The spotlight's on

The collective sigh

Makes way,

Anticipatory silence following.

She steps in,

Seeming to fulfill

All that was promised,

Not an inch exposed;

Imagination

Driven to madness.

Her keepers give the cue

And off goes a layer

With planned precision;

The little that is seen

Shows perfection achieved

Through hours of concealing.

Slowly,

As the spectators sit

Barely breathing

Out of fear of exploding,

She exposes all.

Or so they think.

The lighting's such

all blemishes are concealed.

You'd think its cheating

But then again

This is what

They have come for:
A Diana
In all her naked glory
and in her virtues;
In the whore on sale:
A bride soon to be.

Just a Part-time Cynic

Of course I'm a romantic

Subscribing to

All the strictures of love;

Waiting for that epiphany

Where the world will stop

As we lay eyes on each other

for the first time.

There'll be sleepless nights,

Surely different from now,

When it will be for a sight

Of your flawless face

That my soul would pine.

It will be then

That I'd learn to live,

Find the meaning of my being;

These twenty years

Being but an excuse

Of an existence.

Of course I believe in love

And would like nothing else

But to lose myself 

(Whatever I have made of me)

In you.

But until then,

The glorious hour that is

When you've swept me

Off my feet,

Excuse me

I have other plans.

I intend to enjoy 

My half existence

Until it's time for love.

Frangipani Laced Memories

Bated breath.

Expectations that hurt.

An exquisite headiness,

Unexplained,

Undeserved.

Every inch of skin,

Aroused,

Excited

The teasing and caressing

Of the intoxicating Frangipani,

Only an unwitting accomplice

To the greater schemes

The ruthless and clever mechanisations

Fate has practiced to perfection.

The same inky sky,

That familiar serenade

Raindrops have sung before;

The treacherous wet earth

So seasoned in causing

feverish frenzies.

Nostalgia.

The slow poison

Of past memories

swirling in the veins.

The bittersweet longing

Of the once carelessly disposed

Drug of ecstasy.

The longing

The burning desire;

Nay, the uncontrollable need

to be in those arms,

Oh! this bane

This cruel call of insanity.

Impossible!

My dream it is unattainable

You walked away

Long ago.

I might as well return.

I am sure

I'll soon I get used to

his otherness.

Till then

I will just have to bear

The slush, the muck

The mess 

tonight's shower of fantasies

will leave behind.

Elegy on a Light Bulb

It flickered
Like the shy blinking
Practiced to perfection
By the seasoned coquette.
It has lived;
Its virtuosity
Illuminating
So many.
But no longer.
The darkness is alluring,
So deceptively soothing.
The time has come
For the heathen plunge
Into the forbidden pool
Rippling with ecstasy;
The time has come
To die.

Wet Dreams

It's a dark world

And all's asleep

I am no different.

But is my slumber peaceful?

My breath is ragged

While I writhe in bed;

The ebony silence

Teased by my moans.

I wake up

To a warm wetness

And an empty bed.

Another night joins

The sands of my hourglass;

As I wake up

Not to your gentle kisses

But to my tears

Of Wedding Dresses and half Baked Dreams

In the white dress

Her white wedding dress

She walks down, so demure

The white skirt swaying

Like the wedding bell

That’ll soon announce her

The man’s wife.

She sits there

Watching herself

Exchange the nuptial vows

Seething with envy

Only to lose herself

In a mirthless laugh

Of self mockery

The very next instant.

She has turned

Into such a cynic

When it comes

 To love;             

And why not

When with all the pleasures

Of the mortal soul

It’s the fabled pains of love

Whose absence

Torments her thus.

She has turned

Into such a cynic

But not quite.

The romantic in her

It’s still there

Gagging

Gurgling

Choking

Gasping for its last breath

Letting out soul wrenching shrieks.

Enough.

She’s had enough.

This sweet nightmare

She wants no more;

But her eyes

They just won’t shut.

She lets out a sigh

Part resignation

Part longing

But mostly just despair

She can’t help it

Her eyes wide open

She continues to stare.